Single Parenting
Single parenting is not an easy choice to make, but it could be the right one for you. Our desire is to help you avoid placing yourself in a potentially stressful and harmful situation. Here are some questions to ask:
Where can I live with my baby?
Look into your housing options before you deliver. Some possibilities include living with a friend or relative, living with your parents or the father's parents, living in a group home for single mothers, or living in a public, subsidized housing. Look for a safe and affordable place to live. Consider childcare options in each situation. If you are a student, ask if your school offers daycare. Some counselors can give advice about daycare centers.
Can anyone help me get items for my baby?
Many churches and community agencies are eager to help with baby items. Your pregnancy counselor or local crisis pregnancy center can connect you with parenting classes and other resources, including public assistance for medical and financial needs.
How do I get support from the father?
The father's legal responsibilities include providing financial support for your child. Most states have a child support enforcement agency which will withhold money from his paycheck if he is unwilling to pay. If the birthfather is unable to provide child support, you need to plan how you will care for your baby without it. A birthfather's support record may influence court decisions about custody and visitation rights.
I don't want to be a mother on welfare. Can I get job training?
If you are receiving assistance, you may be eligible for programs which help with job training, tuition, and child care. Otherwise, you might rely on educational grants and loans while working to cover living expenses and child care. Single parenting often means altering your goals and plans, but with determination and job training, you can achieve greater security for yourself and your baby.
Can I still choose adoption later if parenting doesn't work out?
If single parenting becomes too difficult and you decide to consider adoption, adoption is still an option. It takes courage to realize that by yourself you cannot provide all that your child needs. But separating from a child with whom you have bonded can be difficult. A trusted and wise counselor can help you and your child through this process. Look for an agency that can help you make an adoption plan you can live with.
If circumstances are making your pregnancy difficult, call Birth Choice and let us offer you assurance and support. You are not alone. There are many people who care about you and your baby and can help you navigate through this time. We are willing to stand with you and help you find the courage and resources to support your decision. All our services are free. (951) 652-3111
Here are some of the ways we can help:
- Pregnancy tests/ultrasounds
- Counseling with trained, lay counselors
- Assistance in applying for Medi-Cal or AIM
- Maternity and baby clothes formula and diapers
- Support groups
- Maternity housing referrals
- Adoption referrals and counseling
- Medical, financial and legal referrals
- Earn While You Learn- a Pregnancy&Parenting Educational Program
- PAS - A recovery group for women needing healing from a past abortion
Birth Choice's services are designed to help you acess community resources as well. Most of the help is temporary and designed to get you started on the path to self sufficiency. There are now many educational materials and support groups for single parents. Check into Focus on the Family Single Parenting resources at www.family.org, and local church programs.